Living under one roof with a toddler is always full of surprise. Not to mention the numerous milestones, and all the other excitement of exploring the world together! All of those are happy and thrilling. But, there are also moments when my personal tolerance-meter rises to its limit extremely fast . There are situations which drive me to raise my voice or make a negative comment, and I really regret it afterwards. Because most of the times it wasn’t necessary at all. Lets say, Alya accidentally knocks off a cup of her/my drink, drops a plate with some food on the floor, leaves few sticky handprints on the furniture, and the list can go on and on. These accidents and their repetition sometimes make me boil, and I really feel like saying – HOW COULD YOU DO THIS?!! you ALWAYS spill (drop, smash) stuff because you are not paying attention!
BUT! I stop myself right there, and force a smile or even laugh and say – Baby, it’s ok. Mess happens, next time be careful, look around, and pay more attention. Let’s clean up the damage together.
Sometimes, I need to make an effort to act in a positive way, but at other times I find myself naturally coping. In both cases I know she is aware she made a mistake, and I see discomfort and fear in her eyes. That’s why I don’t want to feed her negative feelings with my useless negative comments. Because similarly, I don’t want the same comments coming from Alya, if I’m the one messing up with something. Let’s face it – adults make mistakes almost as much as kids do, but somehow kids automatically get punished or mentored, while grown ups get out of it with simple “C’est la vie” resolution.
Striving to be fair to both of us actually resulted in less tantrums, more trust between us, and a happier atmosphere at home.
[Graphics credit goes to my husband 🙂 ]